90 Days of Crossfit

To catch you up to speed in a few words, the Paleo challenge went well. Despite two vacations during the month I somehow managed to lose 3 lbs., 1 inch off of my waist and a 1/2 inch here and there. I was in Florida last week and I literally ate everything in my path. I think Jesus was looking out for my poor little diet because he let the calories slide and I didn't bloat up like a blow fish. Whew!

I'm going to keep this post short because its purpose isn't to talk about my diet. This is one to show results. I've got bikini pics on my camera at home but I don't have the nerve to post those just yet. I've got some stubborn stomach fat to get rid of before I'll feel good about those!

Now, when I first started Crossfit I took a picture of myself in some high-waisted linen pants that I bought in college. They were tight when I bought them but at least I could button them! When I started crossfit I needed Vaseline to get them past my thighs and then a crane to pull them up past my butt. They were very tight and I didn't even have them buttoned! I've used these white pants to measure my progress.

Without any further ado:
 
Do not be fooled. If I had exhaled sharply or laughed the button on those pants would have put Polly's eye out. Or broken some glass. I know that my love handles and gut are pouring over the top but I have no intention of quitting after 3 months!

Here I am on my very first day of Crossfit. Barf. Ever wonder "How did I let this happen?" If this picture had a title it would be "I Didn't Know I was Chunky." Seriously? Seriously. My face was beet red from sunburn to add to the attractiveness! I almost died this day. Literally.

90 Days Later: This picture is, in my mind, 1,000x better. In the interest of full disclosure, I will tell you that I folded like piece of paper shortly after this picture was taken and had to strip the weights off of the bar to finish the last 10 reps.

I've had lots of questions about Crossfit since I started and I want to be completely honest here. My body has not changed in the ways that I wanted and/or expected it to. Before, when I would diet and take up a running routine, I'd get skinny all over. I never had any real muscle definition but at least my clothes fit better. This is the only way I had known. With Crossfit, I have gotten smaller but my legs are toned, my arms are taking shape and my butt has lifted and toned up as well. I am not taking on the "model skinny" shape I used to but rather a more athletic physique. So, the JCrew model figure illudes me again! Don't misunderstand- I do not look like, nor will I ever, look like a body builder. I'm not that determined and I like food too much.

I can now wear all of the dresses that were too small when I started Crossfit which is the reason I started in the first place. I feel so much better about myself. I've still got a way to go but I'm happy with the progress I've made.

Anyone else have pics they'd like me to post? Send them my way! (I'm looking at you Denna!)

Off I go to take my favorite munchkin and her mama to lunch!

-Sunny

Tres y Quatro

I feel like I should start off by saying proclaiming that I just ate two scrambled eggs. Without gagging. For the first time I can remember.

Now, back to business as usual. I got tied up yesterday (figuratively, not literally) and couldn't blog so this is a two-fer-one. I'll dive right in.

Day 3
Breakfast: 3 sausage muffins, Diet Coke
Lunch: Somewhere between 1/4 and 1/2 of a smoked chicken, sweet potato, water
Dinner: 4 oz of grilled flank steak, roasted carrots and zucchini, water
Snack: Protein shake shortly before dinner

Day 4
Breakfast: 2 sausage muffins, Diet Dr. Pepper
Lunch: Chicken grilled with red peppers, Spanish rice, water
Dinner: Smoothie made with grapes, mango and peaches with some coconut milk. Protein shake.

I'm actually leaving for Charleston today so I started off with scrambled eggs and bacon. And a Diet Dr. Pepper. Now, some of you are probably shaking your fingers at me saying "Sodas aren't Paleo" and I'm saying "No crap." I allow myself one a day because a month ago I was drinking 4 cokes a day. Not diet, but regular coke. Then it was Pepsi. So, I've gotten down to one a day and if I don't have it my eye starts twitching. I'll find a better alternative.

In preparation for this vacay, I made more sausage muffins this morning so that I'd have something for back up should I find myself stranded in Fastfoodville. I'm interested to see how the Challenge holds up this weekend. Adam is super supportive of my whole Crossfit/Paleo deal so I'm lucky in the aspect that he won't purposely tempt me. Except Wednesday when he waved french fries in my face.

I wanted to go visit the Crossfit in Charleston but I rolled my ankle coming off of a box jump this morning so I think that's out. BTW, I rolled my ankle because I was being nosey and turning my head to hear a conversation behind me and my feet turned with me. NOT because of exhaustion/being pushed too hard. I was, and still am, pretty upset that I didn't finish the WOD because it was a really good one. Anyway, I'll leave you the recipe for my easy peasy roasted carrots and zucchini before I embark on our voyage.


Roasted Carrots
Ingredients:
Carrots
Olive Oil
Kosher or Sea Salt
Pepper

Directions:
1. Preheat your oven to 425. Cut your carrots into quarters length wise and arrange them on a baking sheet. I used my stone baking sheet but whatever floats your boat! If you're using metal I advise parchment paper as the sugar from the carrots may make a mess on your pan.

2. Drizzle some Olive Oil over the carrots and toss them to coat. Sprinkle with sea salt, pepper and paprika. Toss again to coat.

3. Roast them for 25 minutes or until they're fork tender. I have to check on mine frequently because depending on the size of the carrots they may cook faster.

Done! Adam doesn't love these but he's not a carrot eater. I, on the other hand, love them. I'm going to try adding some garlic powder to them next time.

Roasted Zucchini
(I know that this is probably remedial for a lot of you but some people don't cook and have no idea that it's this easy!)

Ingredients:
Zucchini
Olive Oil (Or whatever oil floats your boat)
Kosher or Sea Salt
Pepper
Garlic Powder

1. Preheat oven to 425. Cut Zucchini into quarters length wise, then cut again into quarters across. Did that make sense? Just chop it up!

2. Spread zucchini out onto baking dish and drizzle with Olive Oil. Season with salt, pepper and garlic powder. I like a lot of all of it and some people don't like much seasoning so it depends on your personal taste. Just don't drown it with salt!

3. Roast for 20 minutes or until tender. Again, depending on your oven it may take longer! I roasted my zucchini and carrots together this week and they were great. The zucchini may have cooked a little too long but it still tasted good.

Adios!
Sunny

Day 2

Day 2 went just as well as Day 1. Except on Day 2 I ate breakfast for dinner but it was still within my guidelines. Here's my daily food journal, I figure we'll get it out of the way instead of making an entire post about what I ate.

Breakfast: 2 Sausage Muffins, Chocolate Protein Shake (within 30 minutes of my workout) and Water

Lunch: Leftover Indian Chicken with Spaghetti Squash and 1/2 of a sweet potato that I nuked in the microwave for 4 minutes with a pat of butter. I actually didn't finish my plate, but that's what was on it.

Dinner: 3 sausage muffins with mustard and a glass of milk.

Ok, I was going to lie and leave out the Diet Dr. Pepper Granny got me when we went to the grocery store but in the interest of full disclosure, I drank a Diet Dr. Pepper. There.

I don't know about you guys, but I seriously underestimated my love/addiction for/to bread. Around 3:00 yesterday afternoon I could smell bread in my office. No, there wasn't any bread remotely close to me but I wanted it!

Side story- Last week someone brought donuts into the office. Thinking that it would be funny, my boss brought them into my office and told me to take them on home. Well, having iron-clad will power like I do, I shoved them in the garbage and flattened them. The next day I was having a sugar attack and I remembered the donuts. I dug those same donuts that I'd so fervently smashed into the trashcan out and took a monster sized bite only to find that I'd also thrown a paper towel soaked with windex into the garbage. The windex flavored the donuts. Enough said. Gag.

No, I didn't swallow the donut. I spit it out and could taste my bad judgment for an hour after.

For those of you who are interested, I've been using a website to track my food intake. I like to obsess and chart things, so this is right up my alley. It's called Lose It and you can program it to count protein and carbs in addition to calories. Just go to the settings tab and customize. It's a little tricky setting up foods that you cook yourself but, like I said, I like obsessing over these things so I didn't mind it so much.

I found a website called PaleoMom. She had an interesting article on carb intake. Before I read this article, I was just eating whatever fruits/veggies I wanted. Just this morning I was going to make hash browns to go along with breakfast. Then I remembered this article, googled "carbs in a russet potato" and threw the taters in the TRASH. If I'm limiting my carbs, I'm going to put them to good use! Same thing goes for juice. ONE CUP of Adam's cranberry-grape juice had 31 carbs! THIRTY-ONE!  I didn't even eat that many yesterday!

After just THREE (I ate good on Sunday) days of cutting out the garbage, I can already tell a difference-most notably in my stomach. It looks significantly less fat. Also, my face is less puffy. It could have something to do with the fact that I am drinking an insane amount of water. Before any of you smarties tell me that I need more green in my diet, I went and bought a boatload of the green stuff yesterday so tonight I engorge myself.

Anyhoo, stay strong my fellow losers!

-Sunny

Day 1 and Polly in a Shirt

How did Day 1 of the Challenge go for y'all? It went swimmingly for me! I'm going to post some recipes here so get ready. They are modified Paleo and all of them are delish!

For those of you who don't already know, I issued a challenge to my peeps to eat clean for 30 days. We all know that it doesn't matter how hard you work if you're going to fuel your body with junk. I was sabotaging my progress with the food I eat. As a way to keep myself honest, I'll be journaling my meals here.

Since I have to get back to work I'm going to keep this one short and sweet

Breakfast: 2 sausage and egg muffins, 1 banana, Diet Coke (I know, I know) and Water

Lunch: Garlic Chicken, Steamed cabbage, 1/2 of  a Sweet potato and a small side salad of mixed greens with fresh tomato and a Paleo Balsamic Vinegarette, Water

Dinner: Indian Chicken served over Spaghetti Squash with Water to drink

As promised, here are the recipes.

Sausage and Egg Muffins
These aren't really muffins but I made them in muffin tins so I call them muffins. Muffin.

Ingredients:
6 eggs
1 lb. sausage (can be hot, turkey, sage, mild, etc. Whatever floats your boat.)

1. Brown the sausage and crumble it. Drain.

2. In a mixing bowl, combine all eggs, salt, pepper and a little half-and-half or milk. Beat the tar out of them.

3. In a regular muffin tin, portion out the sausage evenly so that you've got 12 muffins 1/2 full of sausage.

4. Spoon scrambled egg mixture over the sausage. I used a measuring cup to do this. I averaged 1/4 cup of the eggs per muffin.

5. Bake on 350 until the eggs are set. Eat.

*Word to the wise. Don't use muffin liners!!! The sausage is greasy enough that they won't stick to the muffin tin. If you're worried about sticking, you can butter the tin first. That would actually probably be delicious.

Garlic Chicken
This is a variation of a slow-cooker recipe I found. It's delicious and very forgiving. My husband loathes onions so I didn't include them but I can imagine that they'd be divine to caramelize with the garlic!

Ingredients:

1 whole chicken, cut up. (I used 4 leg quarters because I like the dark meat. That, and it was cheap.)
40 cloves of garlic (This is approximately 2 heads of garlic)
Salt and Pepper
2 tbsp of butter, divided
olive oil
Onion (optional)
White wine or chicken broth

Directions:

1. Preheat your oven to 350. To peel garlic, place cloves in pot of simmering water for 30 seconds-1 minute. This will make peeling much easier!

2. In a dutch oven or oven safe pot with a lid (could transfer to a casserole dish if needed), pour in a couple teaspoons of olive oil and  1Tbsp of butter. Salt and pepper the chicken. Once the oil is hot, brown chicken on both sides and remove from pan. This may need to be done in batches. Just add more oil/butter as needed. We're not frying it, we're just browning it. It will not be done when you remove it from the pot. That's fine- we're going to be putting it in the oven anyway!

3. Once the chicken is browned, throw the garlic cloves in there. Stir them around and let them get good and golden. (If you're using onion this is the part where you would put the chopped onion into the mix). After 1-2 minutes (stir constantly!),  pour in 1/2 cup of white wine to deglaze the pan. This should get the stuck on chicken parts off of the bottom. Let this bubble for a couple of minutes.

4. Add the chicken back into the pot and spoon some of the garlic up onto the top. Put lid on pot and place it into the oven and let it cook for 45 minutes to an hour. The chicken will be falling off of the bone! Serve with roasted veggies. This is a crowd pleaser!

*For those of you who don't like to use alcohol, feel free to use chicken STOCK. Not broth! Broth is watered down!

**If you are using boneless skinless chicken breasts you may want to add 1/4 cup of stock to the wine right before you add the chicken. When you use bone-in chicken it creates its own broth. We don't want dry chickens!

This dish reheats beautifully. It actually tastes better the second day so feel free to make it a day ahead! Can also be cooked in a crockpot. I would make sure to brown the chicken, though- it adds a layer of delicious flavor.


Indian Chicken

I already posted this recipe Here.

Adam and I eat this all the time. You can add in heavy cream, half-and-half, or sour cream at the end (about 1 cup) to make it a creamier dish but to make it Paleo I didn't add any and it tasted just as good! Served over Spaghetti squash that I cooked in the microwave for 11 minutes. Yumm-O!

So, good fellows, that's what I done ate! I'll be having Indian Chicken leftovers for lunch and I am contemplating some lemon pepper chicken for dinner. Or a spicy grilled flank steak. We shall see!

Also, Polly demolished an egg carton yesterday. She also nibbled on a tomato for some antioxidants.

Then, Adam put a shirt on her because he thought it was funny. Polly isn't amused. She's been walking around like a prisoner in shackles.

I'm so going to find this shirt in a million pieces when I get home!

Go eat something green and fibrous!

Over and out,
Sunny

Challenge

Hello! It's me! I bet you all thought that I have stopped going to Crossfit and gone back to my donut eating ways. Nope! I've been going strong. With the exception of two weeks ago when I had the cold from hell and only went once, I've consistently gone to Crossfit 5-6 days a week. It's still just as hard and ridiculous as it was before except now I'm actually hearing "Good, Sunny!" and "That's right! Keep going!" whereas I used to hear "That's not it!" and "Get your butt down!"

The workouts are still insane. This morning was Cindy. For those of you who don't speak CFDGA, that's 5 pull ups, 10 push ups, 15 air squats. Repeat. For twenty flapping minutes. Eric actually issued a quasi apology and muttered something like "necessary evil" before we started. You know it's going to be ugly when your coach is apologizing! Dr. Death and I were in a corner together so I did my darndest to keep up with her.

* Dr. D is ridiculously strong and has great form. I am a limp noodle and have mediocre-poor form. She did unassisted pull ups, I jumped off of a block. What I mean to say is that I was doing modified reps to keep up with her prescribed ones! That's nuts!

I somehow squeezed out 13 rounds. After those thirteen rounds were completed I sprawled out on the floor spread eagle in front of the gargantuan fans. I wanted to vomit. Five hours later, I still want to vomit! I mean, that's 390 reps! 130 push ups! Dude!

Here's a shot of me being athletic over there in the corner.

There is no excuse for that leg action.

However, the point of this post isn't to tell you about the workout. We have established that they are all insanely hard and us lunatics are always chomping at the bit for the next one. It's inexplicable! The purpose of this post is to inform my fellow junkies that as of Monday, June 18 I will be self-issuing a 30 Day "Eating Clean" Challenge. We all work so hard but we are slowing our own progress with the food we eat. I came up with this idea after noticing that I'm not really "shrinking" anymore. The first month was really baller. I shed a few inches and felt great. Well, month two is here and I can't tell I've been doing anything! Sure, I'm stronger than I was but I still feel like I look a little bloated and mushy.Someone once told me that I was going to be obese by age 30 if I keep eating like I do so I figure now is as good a time as any to turn this boat around.

Why am I starting this in the middle of the month, you ask? Because I'm going to the beach in 3 weeks and isn't this what girls do? Also, if I'm on the challenge and competing against my fellow Crossfitters, I won't eat so much crap on vacation. In theory. We'll see how that one pans out!

So, for you who want to participate, pick your poison. You can go Paleo or you can just modify your diet to cut out the bad stuff. Whatever you need to do to get it did. Personally, I am going to do Paleo. I will be allowing myself sweet potatoes and the occasional white potato. I will not be eating grains. Yes, you heard me. No grains. No bread, no oatmeal, no nothing.

Once upon a time (last month) I gave up grains for a week or two. Like, I really didn't eat any. And I felt better and I looked deflated. Then I started cheating and I looked bloated again and I felt yuck. So. Moral of the story is: Sunny doesn't do well with the grains. Don't try to change my mind. Ok? I'm trying not to be a chunky monkey here. I'll get my fiber from veggies, thank you very much.

Ok, so. Go weigh yourself, take pictures of yourself, measure... Whatever you want to do to track your progress. If you have pictures, pretty please send them to me or at least let me know your measurements. I would like to do a post around the 15 day mark to track progress. Nothing like a bunch of strangers looking at your fat pictures to keep ya motivated.

Also, sorry I kind of dropped off. Work has been busier than usual and I am going to attempt to start blogging before work so we'll see how that goes. Anyway, go pick your poison and buy your groceries. This is going to be fun!

Winner gets bragging rights and a prize TBD. (To be donated!)


Holla,

Sunny

ps. This does not mean to go home and eat all of the ice cream out of your fridge, by the way.

Mission

I may or may not have mentioned that I'm on a suicide mission this week so I'm going to CF every day. Monday-Saturday. I'm doing this mainly because I'm trying to expedite the slimming process but also because I like being around people and I have a captive audience at CF so it's a win/win. It has been insanely hot this week so the gym has become a steam room of sorts. You know it's hot when you want to go outside when it's 90 degrees to "catch a breeze" that may or may not have been created by the person running by you.

Anyhoo, I went last night and it was a real gem. I thought we were taking a break from legs when I saw that the movement of the day was shoulder presses. I'll be the first to admit that I whiz through them faster than others because I lift barely any weight. I feel that my days of glory with the 30 lb bar are soon going to be over and MP is going to make me be a big girl and use the 45 pounder. Eek!

Once we finished the movement we moved on to the actual workout which was Thrusters and Pull-Ups! Yay for pull-ups! I say this semi-jokingly because it's not that I'm good at the pull-ups, it's that I suck less at pull-ups than push-ups so it's all gravy. We did 3 thrusters and 3 pull-ups, 6 thrusters and 6 pull-ups, and so on until we reached 15 or 18. All in seven minutes.

First off, let me tell you that I had a literal powerhouse of a girl in front of me. It was her second day and she was throwing weight around like Polly does her pet raccoon. I like to attempt to keep pace with everyone else so suffice to say that I was winded by the time the whole ordeal was done. I was a little slow getting my box in place for pull-ups (I do jumping pull-ups since I'm still "perfecting" my movement) so I had to run across the gym for that portion since I didn't get a good spot. I'm pretty sure I had angels leading the way because it was a literal mine field of equipment and things that Sunny likes to trip over. I'm not over my last fall yet so I'm trying to put some space between the injuries. During the pull-up time I was contemplating (aloud) the likelihood of my being physically able to hoist my person sufficiently on the higher bar when I heard MP shot, "This is the 5:30 class! No whining just do it!"

Tom Hanks? Is that you?

Somehow I forgot my multiples of three, skipped 9 and went straight to 12 reps so I had to go back to nine. My set went like this: 3-6-12-9-15. I only made it to seven on the last set of thrusters because we ran out of time and I wanted to kiss that timer square on the screen I was so glad to be done! Being in a class where you are the weakest link will really encourage you to suck it up and hustle through. Being in a class where you are the weakest link will also get you a lot of strange looks but it's all good, everyone sucked at some point.

I was thoroughly drenched in sweat when I left and my legs felt like jello. I considered myself to be completely worked out. Most of the members of my old class have pretty much moved up to the big kid's class so I'll be in good company this afternoon.

The push-ups are coming. I was a smidge "tighter" last night as I was focusing on squeezing everything and keeping that "counter balance" in check. They are a beast, though!

Everyone have a safe and happy memorial day weekend. I know I'll be getting some MUCH needed sunshine!

Adios,
Sunny

30 Days of Crossfit

Well, peeps, yesterday marked the 1 month marker for my Crossfit journey. One month ago I was stomping around my room throwing dresses everywhere because they wouldn't fit. After that little temper tantrum I decided to do something, so here I am now. A lot of people have been asking me how it's going so I'm going to do a month in review.

The first week was really tough. The only thing that got me through was going almost every day the gym was open because I was afraid of the soreness that would sit in during my "day of rest". Week two was a good week. I felt encouraged and like I could tackle pretty much anything that came my way. Week three was tough but manageable. I could really tell a difference in my energy levels. I had been trying to follow the Paleo diet and I'd say I follow it 80% of the time. Breakfast is what kills me. I hate eggs. Love grits, but they aren't allowed so they're out. Biscuits are my life. I want biscuits for every meal. Needless to say, we're still working on the diet part!

Then there was week four. Oh week four. I swear it's like Eric knew that I'd been eating donuts at work or something because I promise you those were the toughest freaking workouts to date and they were all consecutive! Wall balls ran rampant. We rowed until our hearts wanted to explode. We ran. We dead lifted. We rowed some more. And we planked. We ran. It just keeps going! It was insane! I lost 1/2" off of my waist last week alone!

For the one month workout Eric had something special planned. Now, I seriously doubt that he had it marked down as "Sunny's One Month Mark" but I really think that he subconsciously knew. I saw people running the 400m course when I pulled up. Rut row. When I walked in I saw people jumping. JUMPING!  On boxes! Boxes that were 20" or higher! I wanted to just DIE when I saw those boxes! We know how I felt about jumping over the utility blocks, but  now I was supposed to jump on two of them stacked on top of one another! Great! I am not exaggerating when I say that I would have rather someone throw me in a pool full of snakes.

So, to clarify, we were run 400m, do the normal stretches, 10 push ups and 25 burpees to warm up. Then I got to do back squats for the movement (I still do front squats because my hips "roll under" and my core is weak and I tend to lean forward). The actual workout was 20 box jumps with a 400m run in between followed by a 2 minute break. Repeat. Four times.

Somehow I made it through the jumps with minimal drama. I still felt like I was going to fall over the front of the blocks and bust out my teeth (my #1 fear at Cossfit) but I didn't. So I jumped and ran and jumped and ran. Right at the end I tweaked my arm movements and got a little more momentum of ouf them. Oh man, I was so happy to be done with that workout! But wait, there's more! We had to choose between doing dips or "Awesome Push ups" as our cashout for the day. Awesome push ups are push ups that dont' suck like they usually do. Well we know that I suck at all things upper body so I was directed to do push ups so that I could "perfect the movement". Ha. Ha. Ha.

During my first week at Crossfit I remember thinking "Is my lower back supposed to hurt during these?" No, moron. It is not. It hurts because you are doing them wrong and you're being a sissy. My hideous form gained the attention of some of the guys so they took me under their wing and attempted to teach me how to do one properly. The problem is that I'm so weak up top that I'm just pulling my chest up and my butt is sagging behind. A saggy arse is no good when one is doing push ups. After much yelling and discussion and a few comments like "I think there's some extra mass back there weighing her down," we decided that I just needed to practice my "let downs" and worry about pushing up later. Gotta build that core!

The cashout just about broke me. Frustrated doesn't begin to explain the emotion. I don't know what I'm going to have to do to get my core stronger but I'm willing to do just about anything! It takes time to perfect movements and get everything right. You can't start out on top. I know all of these things, but it doesn't make the feeling that you're failing go away. That's a tough pill to swallow! I didn't mention it earlier but I've made the switch to the 5:30 class so I have the feeling that I'm going to be slamming my head against the wall a lot more now that I've got the pictures of health and fitness running laps around me as I dry heave and shuffle my way through the runs.

On a positive note, I can say that I've lost 2.5 inches off of my waist and other miscellaneous inches that add up to 6.5 total. I've got before and after bathing suit pics but I'm saving them for the 90 day marker so that I can really see how far I've come. That, and I want to be a former blubber butt before I start sharing bikini pics!

If anyone has any before and after pics from Crossfit or any other program they've been doing, I'd love to write up a post on you and what you've been doing! Crossfit isn't for everyone, but we should all be striving to be fit and healthy! Nothing like some good before and afters for motivation! (I've got specific people in mind and they know who they are!)

 I hear we're doing shoulders tonight! I would usually dread it but I'm so happy that my feet will be on the ground that I don't care!

On a totally unrelated note, Polly has revealed to us that she is completely able to jump up on the bed unassisted. After a year of me hauling her up and down! The heifer got tired of us ignoring her on the floor so she just hopped up the other day! I really don't know what I'm going to do with her.


Laters,

Sunny

Jackie Ohhhhh

Remember my pal Hellen? Yeah, she was a real bitty to deal with. On Wednesday I had the pleasure of meeting her sister, Jackie. Jackie sucks. She definitely kicks you when you're down. For those of you who aren't abreast on sunny-crossfit-anese "Hellen" and "Jackie" are the names of certain workouts. Jackie consisted of a 1000m row, 50 Thrusters and 30 pull ups. All in a row. No breaking it up for some variety. (Here is a link to the actual workout done in 1/2 of the time it took me. These women are BEASTS!)  It was pure unadulterated hell preceeded by 20 back squats at 80% of our max weight (I just lifted the 45 lb bar since my core isn't strong and I start going wonky around #5).

By now you all know how I feel about that blessed rower. My first time up I went 500m. I didn't keep track of distance the second time but I went for 3 minutes. My third time at bat I had to row 1000m without a break. I figured I could knock it out in about five minutes. Eric was kind enough to inform us that it was right around a mile distance wise and that really did a number on my mental state.

A mile? Rowing? A MILE? Running a mile makes me want to die so rowing must be absolutely wretched. I was in the first "heat" for rowing (since we only have two machines we break off into pairs) and somehow finished right around the 4:30 mark. Solid! Thrusters suck any way you slice it so of course they were awful but I made it through. (I used the 30 lb bar since I'm still a weakling. My fellow classmates used the 45. I would. have. died.)

The 30 pull ups was probably the hardest part for me. I did the first five really good but the rest were a wash. My chin technically made it up to the bar but I was jumping and flailing around like a crazy person. Exhausted doesn't begin to describe how I felt after Jackie got done kicking my butt all over that gym. Like I said, she's a very mean girl.

Aside from Crossfit, I feel like there's something I need to be honest about. My diet. I've been really trying to be good and not eat bread, processed sugars or any other forbidden foods. I filled my fridge with meats and vegetable and some fruit this week so that I wouldn't eat junk at home. However, over the past two days around 3:00 I get this feeling that if I don't run to the bakery and eat as many donuts as possible I will not survive to see another day. Maybe it's sugar withdrawals that I'm going through. I have no clue. But will somebody make it stop! My boss told me that he was calling Major Pain if I didn't stop. It's really that bad! So, fellow healthyish eaters, what do you eat for a snack? Comment here, text me, Facebook me, send Pony Express, Ups... You get it. I eat so well 95% of the time but these afternoon cravings are about to do me in!

On a good note, I've been making smoothies for breakfast to drink alongside my bacon and eggs and they are quite delicious. I highly recommend them if you have problems getting your fruits and veggies in every day. I put a cup of mixed berries (strawberries, blackberries, raspberries and blueberries) with a giant handful of baby spinach, half a banana and approximately 1/4 cup of coconut milk in mine and it was delish. Adam doesn't like a strong banana taste but I do and I wasn't sharing so I put it in there. Polly got what wouldn't fit in my cup and she agreed that it was good.

I am afraid of what tonight's workout will be so I'm not asking around. I'd rather be shocked than dread it for the majority of the day. Besides, when I'm nervous it makes me pee a lot.

K bye,
Sunny

Sunny and the Rower

I have been doing really well with my Crossfit attendance. My first week I went to 4 classes. The second week I went to 5. Week 3 started out strong with 3 classes and Friday made four. Well, three and a half.  Against my better judgment I attended last Friday's class. You know. The one where it's really intense and I'm way out of my league? Yeah. That one. I had advance warning that the workout for the day was a real doozy but I went anyway. No pain no gain, right? From what I heard it would be tough but doable so I felt confident that I'd tough it out and make it through it.

Things were going great until there was a break in the itinerary. Major Pain brought out the two new rowing machines. I saw them when they were still in boxes and I could tell that he was a little too excited about them but when he pulled them out my heart started racing and I wanted to puke.

"I'm going to divide you up into teams of three and you have to row for 1500 meters. Winners get barbeque sandwiches from Southern Heritage and losers do 25 burpees."

Uhhh.... duh I want a sandwich! I was put on a team with two very fit gentlemen and immediately apologized that they were stuck with me. I rowed second and was up against Brandy, my hair dresser and Crossfit buddy. All I remember about this experience was intense burning EVERYWHERE and checking to make sure that I was ahead of her. Looking back, this wasn't the best strategy. I should have paced myself instead of rowing like a maniac. During the last 200 meters I developed a headache at the base of my skull that intensified until I was done. I'm guessing it had something to do with the lack of oxygen to my brain. I kind of forgot to take deep breaths. Whoops! When I stood up my forearms were permanently frozen and I had little red bumps covering my arms. I'm not really sure if the two were connected but I seriously felt like something was not okay with my body at that point.

I know. I'm being dramatic. The rower kicked my butt but at least I won a sandwich! I didn't care so much about the sandwich as I did the burpees, though. As much as I wanted to jump up on top of elevated objects (remember this day?), I didn't think that my seeing spots was conducive to a good workout experience so I peaced out and headed home to recover from my traumatic rowing experience.

I didn't feel too great when I woke up on Saturday so I layed out of the 9:30 class and took it easy.  Besides, we had major cleaning to do to prep for the Mother's Day lunch on Sunday that we had so thoughtfully planned Friday afternoon. I may or may not have made "Berries and Cream" for dessert and Ohmylanta. You don't even need to know the recipe. Just know that I licked the beater clean. And the bowl. Polly didn't know what to think of this behavior. I may have licked the can of sweetened condensed milk, too. Maybe.

Today is most likely going to be a twofer day, so stay tuned for Sunny and The Rower: Redemption as well as the recipe for Berries and Cream as soon as I stop drooling on myself.

-Sunny

The Big Kids Class

Growing up, I always looked forward to the first day of school with a little too much excitement and anticipation. I would lay out my outfit the night before, right down to socks and panties. My backpack would have been packed three or four times to make sure that everything was organized just right. A restless night of sleep and nervousness were also part of my ritual. Something about going somewhere I had never been and doing things I had never done before made me excited and nervous all at once. I thought that I'd left all of that behind me when I was finished with school.

Nope! I sure didn't! On Friday, I went to the big kid's crossfit class. I wanted to puke when I woke up and could barely eat a piece of bacon for breakfast. Driving there I felt like I was going to pee in my pants. (Just keeping it real folks). I knew that when  I got there the anticipation and fear would go away but the getting there was the hardest part.

Well, I made it. And it was rough. Eric was overly enthusiastic about the workout when I got there so I knew that it was sure to be a doozy. The fact that it was named "Hell"en ( Get it? Helen?) solidified my opinion. And hell it was. (They name the workouts after women, btw.) Before class got started I considered ducking out but Adam's friend Paul was in the class and talked me into toughing it out.

**I realize that for non-Crossfitters, it is difficult to understand some of the terminiology so I'll be linking to videos and products to help clarify. When you see a word that is blue and underlined, click on it to follow the link to a video/picture of what I'm talking about.)

We started the workout by figuring out our Dead Lift maxes. That part wasn't too difficult since I've got the muscle tone of a newborn. In five minutes I had my max so I sat back and watched the rest of the class. As the weights got heavier, the grunts got louder and the sound of bars being dropped on the ground echoed throught the gym. It was intense. Thankfully, I was sipping on my Springtime water watching from the safety of the benches.

Now for the workout. First up, we have the Kettlebell. You can find cute ones that look like this, or you can find the ones that we use that look like THIS. Not only are they intimidating to look at but those suckers are heavy! I got to use a baby one but that didn't make the burn any better. Cellulite be damned, I was squeezing everything in my body to get that thing to where it needed to go. I more or less started the movement by placing it between my legs and swinging it up to eye level. You would think that it is all about the arms but it's really your pelvis and glutes that are feeling the burn. At least that's what I was feeling and we know my form isn't perfect.

After the KBs we did pullups. I've talked enough about pull ups for you to know that I hate them and they hate me. Pull ups were followed by a 400m run and then repeated. Three fracking times.

During the running portion I always pass get passed by others who yell out encouragements like "good job!", or "keep going! You're doing great!", to which I usually respond "You lied to me!" or "I'm defriending you!". (Sorry about that Robyn, I'm not really defriending you and I appreciate the water you poured on me afterwards! I was in the heat of the moment!)

The one and only reason I went on Saturday was because it was picture day at Crossfit DGA and MP said that it would mean a lot to him if everyone was there. So I went. And I sweated my butt off. Literally. After pictures (which took all of three seconds) we were divided into teams of three to complete the Workout of the Day (WOD). Here is a picture of the board. It looks like heiroglyphics at first but I'll decipher it for you.

The left side of the board has the teams and the number of reps they did. I am on team #2 and somehow I didn't bog us down too badly. We did pretty great, in fact! The right side of the board is the actual workout. This doesn't include the squats, lunges and run we did to warm up. I really wished they only had one "T" in their last name. You'll know why in a minute.

For the curious, here is the breakdown of the workout.

Squats: aka Air Squats. Basically you just do a bunch of squats. With 3 team members that meant 133 per person. We were timed so were knocking them out pretty quickly.

Clean: Power Cleans. Here is a video of someone doing one with the same weight I did. Just kidding. I did way more. Not.

Overhead Lunges: Lunges holding a weight above your head. They are every bit as fun as they sound. I was supposed to do 100 but I squeezed out 75. It was a painful 75, I promise.

Toes to Bar: Mine were more like knees to boobs but here is what they're supposed to look like. I also swing like a monkey when I'm doing them. One day I'm going to lose my grip and go flying into the wall behind me.

TGU: Turkish Get Ups. MP and Rich (the bossy manchine who loves his nickname, btw) said mine were about halfway correct but I was trying so they let me slide. Here is what they look like. I have a theory that a dentist made these up because, seriously, if that kettlebell falls on your face your teeth are TOAST.

Sea Lions: Oh, the sea lions. I didn't get to these (darn!) because we ran out of time. In case you're wondering, this is what I do not look like doing them. (Excuse the stupid video. It's the only one I could find that didn't have actual sea lions in it. The first few seconds of the video should be sufficient.)

There were 1,030 total reps and our team did 754 in the time allowed. That means we did 73% which is awesome considering we had about 20 minutes to do it.

Dude. I felt like I was going to vomit, cry, pass out, die and laugh all at once. Add to that the fact that the photographer stuck around to get some video footage and I was DONE! I am terrified of the video he got of me because, seriously, I was struggling!

We were actually doing this specific workout to help raise money for one of our Crossfit Families whose house burned down last week. What happened to selling wrapping paper and cookies! Or t-shirts? Everyone likes t-shirts!

All jokes aside, there aren't enough words to describe the feeling of accomplishment I had after the workouts on Friday and Saturday. Going into a gym full of people who have been doing this way longer than I have was intimidating to say the least. I wanted to leave before I had the time to embarrass myself, but I'm glad that I stayed because I would have never known that I can do it.

I'm going back for more tonight and I'm taking fresh meat with me! Yay!

Holler,
Sunny

Ps. I've been looking up Paleo recipes but they all look like vomit. I'm playing with the idea of posting my own modified recipes so stay tuned!

A Picture is Worth 1,000 Words

This post isn't really about anything but I don't think I need to say a whole lot. I can RELATE to this kid!

Preach, sister. Preach.

The Purple Bruise on my Knee Really Compliments my Green Skirt

Yesterday as I wrote the latest post, I started to fear that I was running out of material. Surely they can't change each class up so much that I always have new stories to tell. Right? When will I ever learn.

Before class even got started I encountered Boy Wonder at the water fountain. He informed that me that he had read my blog (uh oh!) and when I asked if he was going to kick my butt he said something along the lines of  "probably".

Remember the pull ups from yesterday? The ones that in no way even remotely resembled proper technique? The ones that I was certain were going to pull my shoulders out of socket? Well, during the pre-warm up period, who did I spy doing pull ups as a warm up? Boy Wonder!!! And he was doing them correctly! Without jumping or kicking his legs like a crazy person! Not that I do that or anything.

Okay yes I do. I am such an epic failure.

Moving right along. Everything went as usual until I learned that we would be doing handstand push ups. In order to do these, one must kick themselves up onto the wall as if they are doing a cartwheel or something of that nature. Once one's feet hit the wall, they then bend at the elbows until their head touches the floor and then bring themselves back up again before kicking off of the wall and bringing themselves back onto their feet.


Well. We all know how coordinated I am so I'm sure I don't have to tell you what happened. Or, more appropriately, what didn't happen. I am not sure where my fear came from but I was terrified of injuring myself. On the first try, I got my feet up but my landing was less than ideal. The result is a lime sized bruise on my left knee that thwarted my plans of wearing my brand new No. 2 JCREW pencil skirt that my best pal hooked me up with over the weekend. I thought that the purple of the bruise and the green of the skirt would complement one another nicely but since the right knee doesn't have one to match, it threw off the symmetry. Black pants it is!

So that you know I'm not exaggerating!

I'm sure that I don't need to tell you that boy wonder, also known as D, was doing the handstand push ups with relative ease. I just pretended that he wasn't there and that I had perfect form. Life is easier when I'm in denial!

We did power cleans and push ups but the real torture came in the form of "toes to bar." The idea is to suspend yourself from a bar that hovers above your head as if you are going to do a pull up. Instead of pulling up, you pull your feet up, using your abs, until your toes touch the bar. In theory your body should be bent in half. Mine looked more like a pike than anything. And not a good pike. It burned so I felt confident that I must be doing something right.

By the end of the hour my arms were stinging furiously and my lower back wasn't faring much better. I think it was all of the glute squeezing we did during the push ups. When I got home I couldn't even lift Polly onto the bed. I dropped her the first time and the second time I just kind of boosted her butt enough for her to be able to claw her way up.

I know, she's a standard poodle and has incredibly long legs. It is an unexplained mystery as to why she can't jump on the bed but she's spoiled rotten so I put her up there. She is, however, able to jump off at the spur of the moment and whine in my face until I get up and put her back up. I have ruined her beyond help.

Today is my rest day so I will enjoy sitting my butt on the couch and watching Law and Order: SVU to my heart's content tonight!


Off to fight the good fight,
Sun Dizzle

Happy Anniversary to Us!

Today marks  1 week for Crossfit DGA and I (me? myself?). Should I buy it flowers? Chocolates? One week ago I decided to do something good for myself and I went to my very first class. One week ago today my butt didn't hurt, my abs weren't sore and I didn't have sunburn on my face and chest. I also had significantly less energy and 10 less friends than I do today. One week ago today I had yet to experience the humiliation that is Sunny doing upper body anything. Push ups, pull ups, shoulder presses, if you can name it I am terrible at it. One of Papa's favorite games it to try to get me to do a push up. He thinks that it is just hilarious that I'm completely incapable of doing one! I am stacked on the bottom so I can do a reasonable amount with my lower body even though I haven't been consistently exercising, but I really am a weakling up top. I've come to accept it. Major Pain is hell bent and determined to change it.

As luck would have it, we did upper body last night. All of my least favorite things rolled into one action packed hour. During the shoulder presses, everyone kept telling me to squeeze my butt cheeks together to help me lift the weight but all I could think was that if I did that, my pants would get sucked into my crack and my cellulite would show through the spandex. Everyone knows that when you tighten the cheeks, the cellulite plays peek-a-boo. It is unfortunate but it's a fact of life. I made it through the shoulder presses somehow, butt cheeks un-squeezed, only to be faced with "thrusters".

Thrusters are a combo shoulder press and squat. You hold the bar in rack position (dangerously close to your clavicle with ELBOWS UP!!!) and squat. On your way up you squeeze those cheeks together and "thrust" the bar upward over your head. (I probably screwed up the description so MP or Mrs. MP will have to correct me in the comments below.) I got to the point where I didn't care who was behind or around me because I was squeezing my glues like there was no tomorrow. I did NOT want that bar coming down on my head! After what seemed like a million billion reps, we were allowed to move on to the next segment: pull ups. I could have done worse but I have lots of room for improvement. To finish up we did planks with sprints in between.

The plank position = DEATH. And, there were mosquitos biting me adding heat to the fire that was my core.

 My sprints were more like a slow jog but after holding the plank for 30 seconds my arms and abs were unhappy and uncooperative. I vaguely remember having to hold my arms in t-Rex position during a few of the runs because I couldn't move them without searing pain shooting through them. I may have looked like an idiot but my arms didn't hurt!

In all seriousness, the workouts are intense. They are exhausting and grueling but that's what they're supposed to be! After only one week I have found that I am more focused at work, I have more energy to when I get home in the evenings and I'm more motivated to eat well because I don't want to undo all of my hard work. An added bonus is that it is easier to wake up in the morning because there is usually something that hurts and the pain will wake you up! This morning it was my quads that did the waking. Yesterday it was my abs.

Back to the grind I go,
Sunny

The Henchmen

In case you don't know much about me, I am an insurance agent when I'm not eating sweets or pinning pictures of my dream home. While I normally get to save people money and make them happy, there are times when I have to be the bearer of bad news. Just last week I had a really angry elf of an elderly woman staring me down as I attempted to lower her monthly bill. I was semi-successful, but it was my delivery of the bad news that kept her from chewing me out. Do you want to know I saved my skin?

I smiled when I told her. Yep. It's as simple as that. No one wants to hear that they owe more money than they had budgeted for from a jerk. So, if you smile when you're delivering the blow, it takes the edge off.

Now, what does this have to do with my normal Crossfit posts? Well, my friends, it has EVERYTHING to do with Saturday. You see, my class decided that we would attend Saturday’s 9:30 am class together to get in an extra workout. We were told that attendance is low, so we felt fairly safe assuming that it would be just us girls.

What did we learn about assuming last week? Apparently, nothing!

When I walked through the door phrases like "Get out of dodge," and "In over my head " flashed through my mind. You all know how I love to be descriptive and I'm not going to let you down. I was instantly aware that we weren't in Kansas anymore when I saw some of the "advanced" guys doing pull-ups and rowing way faster than I ever imagined at the far side of the gym. Actually, they were more like machines than men. Crossfit manchines (lame, I know, but seriously. They were unstoppable). I looked around for my girls and found them stretching in our usual spot. We all had the "oh ****" look on our faces and I think that if I had offered to drive everyone to Cracker Barrel for breakfast instead of staying, I wouldn't have met much resistance. We were the little kids on the big kids' playground. No doubt about it.

Major Pain had other obligations so, in his absence, he unleashed his henchmen on us. His wife was the butt kicker for the day. She smiled during introductions and seemed to be one of the sweetest people I've ever met until she dropped a bomb on us in the form of a ridiculous workout of the day. She did redeem herself with some paleo style strawberry cupcakes (which she delivered with a smile) att the end of the workout, though. She had assistance in the form of a very muscular, very enthusiastic Crossfit regular that sometimes helps out when they need more hands and eyes. He is also loud. And bossy. Soooooo bossy!

I'll cut to the chase and tell you that by the time we were warmed up and ready for our workout of the day, I had already scraped the skin off of my knees and soaked my shirt with sweat. The actual "workout" was pure torture. We did a combination of dead lifts and running. It started off with doing 25 reps and then running 400 meters (1/4 mile) and coming back in and doing more reps, more running, etc. I got lapped so many times by the guys during this process that I quit keeping count.

**I found out during the lifts that I need to work on my flexibility because my butt won't go far enough down. I blame it on my leg and butt fat smushing together and not allowing any more downward movement. Don't try to tell me any different.

I am not exaggerating when I say that I wanted to puke and cry all at the same time. The ONLY thing that kept me going was Mrs. Linda running beside me cheering me on and the bossy manchine yelling at me from the gym that I was going to have to do burpees if I quit running. So yeah, I basically sucked it up because I hate burpees more than I hate running. And Mrs. Linda was sweet enough to run with me. That's what I love about Crossfit. When anyone sees that you are struggling, they automatically jump into cheerleader gear. It also helps that they've all been where I am and remember their first few weeks. Sympathy all around, guys!

When I got back I was seeing stars (in the literal sense) and wanted to curl up into the fetal position, but we had 100 abmats to do (sit ups with your legs butterflied). I haven't done abs in three years so this was an experience I won't soon forget. I still feel like someone kicked my in my ribs.

By the time I was finished I had a pretty ridiculous sunburn on my face but I actually felt better once I caught my breath. I guess the grueling run worked the soreness out of my legs from earlier in the week. Even though it was probably the most exhausting workout I've ever experienced, I was so proud of our class for making it through with the big boys!

I finished the day with some gardening and a second viewing of The Hunger Games which renewed my love for the books. I might read them again this week!

Now, if you will excuse me, I've got to put my smiley face back on and break some bad news!

Peace out!

SJM

New Moves

In college, I had a friend who would say to himself in the mirror, "I'm alert, I'm alive and I feel GREAT!" His dad taught him to say this every morning to start his day off on the right foot.

Well, this morning I managed to get out an "I'm alive!" and that was about it. There were a few grunts and groans, too. I knew that going to Crossfit three nights in a row was a risky move seeing as how I have led a pretty sedentary life up until this point, but my fear of that dreaded "second day soreness" was motivation enough for me to power through. I won't lie, I really did not want to go last night. My legs hurt, my ankles hurt, my back hurt... everything hurt! I began stretching the minute I got home from work and continued to do so for the next two hours leading up to my class. Lord I am such a wuss.

I really should have noted my surroundings when I walked into the gym and taken them as a sign that I needed to turn around and RUN to my car! A friend of mine was finishing up her workout and the only way I can describe the remaining group would be to say that they looked like dehydrated starving lions hunting in sub-saharan Africa. Does that adequately describe it? Think of the animals on Animal Planet who are starving and sharing the watering hole with their prey. That's how they were moving. Go look up exhausted in the dictionary and ye shall find them there. (I should note here that this was one of the more the advanced classes that was suffering so. I mean, the writing was all over the wall in bright letters and I just bounced right over to the stretching area and pretended to see nothing!)

I will say that Major Pain gave my quads and hams a break and focused on torturing my upper body this time. At one point I was absolutely positive that I was going to either tear something or fall over backward from the weight on the bar hovering above my head. I think that my arms were responsible for lifting said weight above my head but I am pretty sure I blacked out during the process so I can't be 100% certain. All I know is that I did NOT want to bring the weight back down!

Oh, remember wonder boy who was working out with us on Tuesday? The one who had endless energy and was doing circles around us? Well, the whole time I was suffering through my arm presses, I had him right beside me doing something that resembled a squirrel crawling backwards up a tree (but on the wall because of course there aren't trees inside). Over and over again. I got tired just looking at him! How's THAT for motivation! And he smiled the whole time. Gag.

Also, I did not wear a bar t-shirt. Actually I did but it didn't have "BAR" plastered across the front and it was really faded so I didn't think it counted.

Let me interrupt by saying that I, being the planner that I am, checked in with MP to make sure that we wouldn't be doing any intensive leg exercises because my legs were so sore yesterday that I was afraid to even attempt to stretch. I was assured that he had some "new moves" for Rachel and I. With renewed enthusiasm I decided to go for the Turkey. Three nights in a row!

I assumed that the aforementioned "new moves" were the presses I'd done so diligently since I assumed that my legs would be left to rest because they had been to hell and back during Tuesday and Wednesday's workouts. It was also the promise of "new moves" that kept me from rapidly exiting the premises when I saw my cohorts suffering through the last ten minutes of their workout.

WRONG AGAIN! You know what they say about assuming... don't!

Shortly (like, one minute) after our arm routine was done, I was rudely introduced to the Burpee. Very rudely introduced. If I had to describe it I would call it a squat thrust on steroids. With a jump at the top. Oh, and we had to jump over a bar between reps. And I was supposed to do 25. My jump resembled a sissy skip more than a two footed jump, but I was so past caring about jump form that I did whatever I could to get my feet across the top of that bar. I was morbidly afraid of falling forward and busting out my two front teeth. I made it through about 14 when my wedding ring went flying out of my "media pocket" in my top so I walked over to my belongings and placed it gingerly on top of my phone. (The top was a gift from the "Easter Bunny" this year. I guess she knew I needed to get my butt off of the sofa and do something! And by Easter Bunny I mean Granny, of course). On my return to my designated area, I rolled my ankle. Yes, I did. I made it through the run, lunges and squats and stretches, tons of "up and downs" on a box and half of my burpees and I roll my ankle WALKING!!! And walking slowly at that!

WHAT IS MY MALFUNCTION!

Aside from the sore ankle that is still nagging me a little this morning, I feel so much better than I did yesterday. Like, a millionbajillion times better. I am deathly afraid that by skipping tonight I am going to wake up with rigor mortis in the morning.

I will also note that I've radically changed my diet over the past few days and I can FEEL IT!!! Not in a good way either. This must be how crackheads feel when they try to kick their habit because I am obviously terribly addicted to sugar and bread. I couldn't put a sentence together yesterday after lunch and I would have mugged someone for a Coke. I might hurt somebody if I don't a) eat pasta or b) get over the withdrawals.

Here's a link to Rachel and I putting our own spin on Burpees.

Just kidding. But seriously? Who has that much fun doing these things sober? I would have to be in the bottom of a bottle to have that much fun!

I'm off to lust after the mini strawberry pastries in the break room.

Laters,
Sunny

Aftershock

Have you ever had your muscle fibers injected with cement and then tried to stretch? I haven't either but that's how I felt yesterday morning when I woke up. Although I was glad that the noodle syndrome was gone, I was so stiff that I thought my legs were stuck to the bed when I tried to move them! I rolled out of bed and onto the floor to stretch. Polly took this as a sign that I wanted to play so she sat on my lap while I did my stretches. No, it wasn't easy or at all practical but she is spoiled and I don't like being mean to her so I let her harass me and lick my face while I attempted to get some of the soreness out.

I pretty much shuffled everywhere I went yesterday with my flexibility returning around 3 pm.

Rach and I ate dinner at my house and decided that we had better measure ourselves so that we could "track our progress." Now, if I were a person who actually knew what good measurements were I might have had my feelings hurt by the numbers but I'm not so I didn't. I did, however, hide the page with our measurements on it in a secret place so Adam wouldn't find it and make fun of me. He is, after all, a string bean with natural muscle tone and definition. He sucks.

At 7:20 Rachel and I, being the mighty warriors we are, walked back into the gym- ready for another hour of muscle building torture. We just knew that we would be working our abs or arms since we had done legs the day prior.

WRONG! Wrong, wrong, wrong a million times WRONG! Instead of squats we switched it up to dead lifts. And by switched up I mean we only squated to 90 degrees vs the approximate 45 from the squats the night prior. And we did this while holding pvc pipes. At first I was glad for the lightness of the pipe but by the end of the night I wanted to impale myself on it and end my misery.

Thinking that there weren't going to be any kids around, I wore yet another City Bar shirt and instead of one kid there were a million. They were there for pitching lessons in another part of the building, BUT STILL! I hardly ever drink and I am the one repping the bar. Granny would be so ashamed!

(This reminds me of when I was in High School and granny would do my laundry. If my cousin or I had anything she thought was too short, tight, sheer or just didn't like, she would hide it in the cabinets in the laundry room. Needless to say there was a stash of miniskirts that I uncovered one day!)

We did get to work our upper bodies in the form of pull-ups (ha!) and push-ups (double ha!). I do this thing where I start laughing when I am failing miserably. Maybe it's a coping mechanism. Idk. Anyway, I was laughing hysterically at myself trying to do 20 push-ups. Idk what Rachel was doing because I was too focused on the intense burning in my chest.

We staggered out of the building and into my car at around 8:40 and headed to pick up Rachel's baby girl. The night was capped off when Rachel's legs gave way and she FELL into her mom's entryway! After I was sure that she hadn't hurt herself, I had to do the leg cross thing because I was laughing hysterically.

I am not kidding when I say that ourlegs were not good for ANYTHING! We were murder bait last night. If someone had come after us, we would have had no defense because our legs were useless.

I made it home around 9 only to remember that my towels were in the dryer. In the basement. That was the true cherry on top. I poured myself into bed after a long shower and I have to say that I have never slept more solidly in my life.

My morning began with the same stretching and face licking from Polly as yesterday but I got a little more stretching in because I distracted her with a rogue shoe string I pulled out from under the bed.

Right now I am feeling about like I was yesterday. We are supposed to be drinking tons of water, but drinking tons of water only makes me have to pee. When I have to pee I have to go squat over the toilet and what I really need is a crane to lower me because my quads start shaking so bad that I think I'm going to fall over. Seriously. This morning I had to grab the sink and the wall beside the toilet and lower myself onto it because my legs just weren't up to the task. That may have been tmi but I'm just behing honest here!

The only consolation I've gotten today has been that Eric said he had some "new moves" for us tonight. Meaning that we wouldn't be using our legs as much. HALLELUJAH!

I'll let you know how tonight goes tomorrow. Until then, I'm having a staredown with my bottle of DeerPark. It is saying "Drink me!" and I am saying "I don't wannaaaaaa!!!"

If you've been thinking about trying Crossfit, give it a shot! I promise you aren't too out of shape. You will never be in good enough shape to be able to go through a workout without wanting to die. That's the point of it (I think), to always push yourself! Also, not everyone runs around in sports bras and spandex like I thought they did.


Peace,
Sunny

Sucking Wind

I'm alive! I have been short on blog material for a while and couldn't put my finger on why I didn't have the inspiration to write. This morning, it dawned on me. I haven't been embarrassing myself in public enough. We all know how I like to make myself look like a fool when the world is watching. Well, my friends, I'm back in action! First, some background.

Last weekend my handsome husband and I attended the wedding of some close friends of ours. It was a lovely affair. What WAS NOT lovely was my inability to fit into ANY of my dresses! Not a single one. I would love to tell you that it's because my boobs have grown so much that I just needed new tops but that would be a bold faced lie. I've gotten chubby. There. I said it. My pants are tight, I can't walk up the stairs without getting winded and my legs jiggle a little too much. It was during the dress trying on process that I decided to do something about it. Enter: Crossfit DGA.

I have seen several friends of mine transform from "meh" to MEOW by going to Crossfit. Now, I've been a member of gyms before, but I know myself a little too well. I need someone yelling at me to exercise or else I'll hop on an eliptical for 30 minutes and be done. I needed to see results SOON so I knew that I needed to take radical measures. Being a total chicken, I absolutely had to have a friend accompany me on my first trip, so I tricked Rachel into going. She's so enthusiastic and bubbly about everything so of course she was game. I can always count on her! We decided on the smaller 7:30 pm class to get us started off.

On the drive to our first class, I honestly wanted to throw up. I had visions of people running in the mud and bleeding and sweating and crying in my head. I thought that the instructor was going to be Satan incarnate with whips and a megaphone screaming in my ear. I contemplated turning around several times but I couldn't let perky Rachel down so I stuck with the game plan.

When we walked in, the facility was quite unassuming. Some bars for pull-ups lined the walls, boxes stacked in a corner, "kettle bells" and weights dispersed throughout. It looked innocuos enough.

One must not judge the book by the cover.

The warm up kicked my arse. We ran 400 meters, came back and lunged forwards and then backwards, we skipped, hopped, "Frankensteined", and did all other kinds of gloriously painful stretches. By then Rachel and I were pouring sweat. Eric, the instructor, then pulled us aside to work on form and introduce us to Crossfit. And boy, what an introduction it was. We squatted and squatted and squatted.

Then we did some more squats and something hilarious happened. He asked us to run to the edge of the fence across the street and back.

*I will note here that I felt like an asshat wearing my City Bar t-shirt because there was a KID training with us. I was annoyed with his endless energy and flexibility. I know it wasn't his fault that I was so out of shape but MAN! He was unstoppable! I wish someone would bottle his energy so I can shoot up with it before I go back!

**In my previous experience with squats, you put your hips back like you are going to sit in a chair. This is NOT what we were doing. I think my butt almost touched the floor. It probably didn't really but that's what it felt like. You do 30 of those bad boys and go for a jog and get back to me on the outcome.

"Oh, sure. No problem!" I stupidly thought.

I can't explain the science of what happened to my body, but there was some miscommunication between my brain and my legs/knees/ankles and somehow my arms got dragged into the big mess. When I tried to take my first step, it felt like my joints had been replaced with rubber bands and my bones were noodles. Not the uncooked kind, but the soggy ones that sat in water for too long and got swollen and gross. We looked like the Golden Girls shuffling across the road. Our arms were going twice as fast as our feet and every time I did anything that remotely resembled running my ankles did this wonky thing where they turned in and my knees went sideways.We were a wreck. We laughed so hard at ourselves that I thought I was going to pee on myself. I had to do the whole "stop and cross your legs" thing. Don't judge, you know you do it, too.

When we got back inside we repeated the process. It was brutal.

Once we were granted permission to leave, we trudged back to our cars. I think that I actually had to lift my leg to put it in the car. It was like I had no control of my limbs! When I got home, I almost tumbled down the hill to my front door because I couldn't stop myself once I got some momentum up. It was so pathetic. Polly was watching me through the window with her head cocked to the side. I'm sure she was wondering why I was walking like I had just had a stroke.

Even after all of the pain and agony, Rachel and I both enthusiastically agreed that this was something worth doing again and that we would join. It's always good to have an accountability partner! Stay tuned for more stories from the dungeon.

 (Day 2: The Aftermath and Subsequent Workout is coming next and it's a good one!)

Holla,
SM